My name is Thomas Tabbernackle and I’m an infantry man in the RCPA’s 22nd Battalion. The 22nd Battalion was composed of twenty MATs or Mobile Assault Teams.
Im going to DM you a basic layout of what a battalion is and how one operates. Presently this is basically gibberish to anybody with knowledge of military unit structure.
“We’re approaching the island. All men get ready for deployment.”
insertion, not deployment. The entire operation is a deployment, during a specific operation its an insertion.
Another member in my squad came up to me.
approached me.
“Get ready. The captain wants to meet with all team members to give us a mission briefing.”
Proper jargon for a Captain is CO, meaning Commanding Officer. A company level commander is the CO, a battalion commander is the Battalion CO, though Battalion Commander is often used too.
“Ok, I’ll be there in a minute.” I said.
"OK, I'll be there in a minute" I said.
(you make this error consistently throughout the piece.) There is no punctuation between the dialog and who is saying it.
“Hurry or he’ll have your ass.” He said.
Aside from the aforementioned issue existing here as well, try using stuff like "he replied" or "he responded" its not grammatically wrong to use "X said" all the time, but spicing it up makes for a smoother flow of the story and can be used to express mood and tone. "He responded excitedly" would communicate excitement about the upcoming mission. "He replied darkly" might be used to hint at foreboding about whats to come.
25 person team that made up our MAT.
Proper terminology is Platoon, but my DM should cover that.
The island has been divided into four sectors designated A, B, C, and D.
Alpha, Bravo, Charlie, Delta
Any prisoner retaliating are to be terminated.
is to be terminated
way to the beach of the island.
shore of the island
Overall Thoughts: Its pretty rough, mainly because you tend to butcher military jargon and terminology. Your dialog is almost there, but not quite in terms of formatting.
Theres a lot here to crit for a line by line, so I am going to offer you my services as an editor instead. If you permit I will directly edit your piece.